Awesome Funny Quotes

Awesome Funny Quotes Biography
Kindly enjoy cool funny sayings and quotes ..

Hope is a good thing - maybe the best thing, and no good thing ever dies

You can't deny laughter, when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. -Stephen King

Never underestimate the power of an extremely pissed off woman - Anonymous

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know i am hilarious. - Anonymous

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Its just that yours is stupid.

When i am reading book and someone asks what i am reading, i never answer them. I just hold up the cover for them. - Anonymous

I would retaliate against your snotty remarks, but since you resemble a garden gnome, i would say the joke is on you.

If you're not good santa doesn't bring you many presents. Like, if you kill someone - that's pretty bad. Then you only get a yayo.

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail.. but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, Man, that was fun.

A guy make s a woman come, it is a talent.. A woman makes a guy come, its a standard.

I am not telling you its going to be easy, i am telling you its going to be worth it.

Sarcasm: the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.

Dependant yes, But also deductible.

Its all good except for poo poo. (Kids sayings) - Delia

Smile don’t frown Look up don’t look down Believe in yourself Don’t let yourself go Just be who you are And let your live flow.

I’m not a fighter. I usually smile and then go into my room and cry my eyes out.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

A smile confuses an approaching frown.

You are not fully dressed until you wear a smile.

If you’re not using your smile, you’re like a man with a million dollars in the bank and no checkbook.

Even if I am in a bad mood I have to smile and be nice to the fans.

A smile is a language that even a baby understands.

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

A girl you proposed, saying I am not a good girl for you, you can find a nice girl better than me is like An IPHONE seller saying you can find China mobile better than IPHONE

 Four out of three people are bad at statistics.
There are 3 types of people in this world:  those who are good at math and those who aren't.
How's my deriving? 1-800-I-DO-MATH
I'm positive I lost an electron.
What part of n=213x Didn't you understand?
Math Problems? Call 1-800-{[243x sin pi] 27893}
Old mathematicians never die. They just lose some of their functions...
Gravity. Don't fall for it.
7 out of 5 people don't understand fractions.
Would a person who does math a lot be called a mathlete?
Math is made of 50% formulas, 50% proofs and 50% imagination.
Math teachers make your life add up!
Use your head for something besides a hat rack!
Math is easy as Pi.
Then the mathematician said "Therefore" and *POOF* and PhD appeared!

You laugh at me because I'm different.....I laugh at you because you're all the same.
I like oxygen. I am a moron. Therefore I'm a oxymoron.
Ignore this message. Hey, if you just read what I just typed, you were not ignoring it!
I give 100%.........10% of the time.......
There are three different kinds of people in the world.......those who can count and those who can't.
All generalizations are false.
You are unique, just like every one else.
School prepares you for the real world, I want the fake world......
I never made a mistake, I thought I did once but I was mistaken.
Come to the dark side.......we have cookies!
I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead.
Some people say I have A.D.D. but they don't understa.........Hey, look a squirrel!
Pirates Aaaaaarrrrrrhhhh cool.
Sometimes when I'm alone, I Google myself.
The Amish know how to raise the roof!
Asteroids rock!
You're beginning to irritate me. It's time to die.
If you see "They are here" on a map where you also see "You are here", you know someone is out to get you.
Yes, no, maybe so, I don't know, so ask Moe. Who's Moe? I don't know.
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
Awesome Funny Quotes
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